Local Ape's Friend Begins to Evolve; Non-Evolving Ape Pissed About It

If you're from around here, you definitely no Bobo and Bananas, the giant apes from the San Deigo zoo. They've filled our hearts with joy and laughter as they clean each other's fur and make ridiculous noises. But, last week, the joke was on Bananas, as the first ridiculous sound he heard was Bobo saying 'hey man, good morning'. While Bananas had taken some time to get some rest in his cave, Bobo began to evolve. The cage has been tense ever since. Bananas has shown frustration by beating his chest, only to be rubuffed by comments from Bobo like 'Is that really necessary? Can we compromise over our differences?' Or 'I understand you're frustrated but you need to articulate.'

As Bananas rage has grown, Bobo has grown more weary. 'I'm afraid for my life sometimes living with this animal. I've applied for a handheld gun permit. I've also put an attorney on retainer to bring a suit against the zoo for improper living conditions.'

Since then, Bobo has applied for Welfare, been offered 5 credit cards and is collecting unemployment and disability.